Friday, June 5, 2009

yesterday is history and its never coming back

I have alot floating around in my head right now so I came here to write it some of it down so excuse me if some thoughts are disconnected.

I have made it my goal this summer to do something fun with the kids every day, whether it be a day trip to the beach or trips to the museum or park, or just camping in the backyard or baking a cake together and letting them decorate it. Today we went to tot time at the Harn Art Museum where they were teaching the kida bout art and the difference and similarities between artists and their styles. Following that we went to CiCi's pizza and had much together. I was thinking this morning about why I made this commitment to myself and to my kids and why I felt it to be urgent that I do it. I've had this little pit of discomfort in my mind I guess you could say. And than it hit me sitting and watching my "babies" inside that pizza buffet. They aren't babies anymore.

Chandler will be 5 and starts preschool this fall. He is writing his name and is starting to read level 1 books. He's getting tall and lanky and his hair is starting to fall into place just like his Daddy's. He is getting his 4 1/2 going on 16 attitude. His Blue Jean teddy Nursery is morphing into a super heroes secret hideout with the Transformers and Spider man available avenge at a moments notice.

And than theres Gwyneth. My sweet little Gwynnie pop. The little girl I HAD to have just given birth too a few months ago. Theres no way its been 2 years. My sweet little baby who melted everyone heart with her toothless grin who now smiles with a full set of teeth as she poses with all the outfits she puts on every 5 minutes complete with her princess tiara and high heel shoes. She knows its not maybelline.. shes born with it! Theres nothing better than getting dressed up for Church on Sunday with her pretty princess dresses and bows in her hair. I look at her eating pizza in the chair cause she no longer needs a high chair and dont do anything for her cause she can DO IT HERSELF!

Sometimes I feel its going to fast for me. I feel like I have taken their time for granted. its so easy for me to get set into my routine of sitting at home, putting PBS kids on for them while I clean , read , check out the lifes of people on facebook. eh Chandlers only 4 theres not a whole for him to do anyway. well look now hes almost 5 and starting preschool.. next year he'll be in kindergarten and when You next blink they'll be in highschool and avoiding me like the plague and your still be sitting there on the internet wondering what the cool people are doing in their daily lifes. Thumbs down to me! Shame on me.. its sounds so cliche but time is short. I've always known this but somedays it hits me more than others but I do have the greatest kids ever.. why wouldn't I want to spend as much time with them as possible.

Sometimes I fear that I am not doing good enough. That I am not putting my kids on the right path. Am I doing anything that well screw my kids up forever? Maybe that a common mom fear. But I want my kids to look back and say " our parents were great and we had a great life. "
Anyway.. sorry for the rambling. I know my kids are doing great and that they've had a good life so far. Sometimes its just so overwhelming realizing how much time has gone by and how life can be taken away so quickly. I know I am only human but I hope that I never find myself taking their time for granted again.

Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't
own it, but you can use it. You can't keep
it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it

you can never get it back. Harvey MacKay

About Us

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Alachua, Florida, United States
Michael - 26 Marissa - 27 Chandler - 7 Gwyneth - 4 Adele - 6 months